Break Down
by Big Cliffy Meanie
Summary: One Shot Song ff! TJSpinelli! After hurtful comments from the Ashley’s will TJ tell Spinelli his feeling (This Summery kinda sux lol!) Rating for Language


Hiya peoples! I down own 'Break Down or Recess. Wow I remembered the disclaimer for once! Please read it! (and soz to my readers who read 'heartbreakers' I will post a chappie tomorrow)

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**Now I know I can handle this  
I'll close my mouth and clench my fist  
I've lived this day in a thousand ways  
But there's a flaw to add to my list  
Go on squeeze a little more  
If you scream I'll just ignore you  
I've rehearsed this scene in a million dreams  
You're getting closer to my core**

Spinelli looked into the mirror as she brushed her long black hair, she looked at her hip hugger jeans and pale blue tank top, her silver belly piercing just visible. It felt like she'd done anything to get TJ to notice her –but after years of trying she was beginning to give up hope. Now even at 16 she hadn't had her first boyfriend or a real kiss –she didn't feel the kiss between TJ and her was real. She'd changed since that carefree tomboy she was in 4th grade, she was deeply ashamed of her looks –she often cried herself to sleep wishing she could look as good beautiful, being 16 ugly and fat was a nightmare.

"Ashley, Gretchen's here" called her mother, Flo joyfully.

"Kay, come up Gretch!" shouted Spinelli As she looked into the mirror and sucking her stomach in.

"Spin you gotta stop that!" said Gretchen coming into the room and looking at her best friend with concern.

"Easy for you to say, you don't have an once of fat on you!" said Spinelli casting Gretchen a jealous look, while Gretchen was tall and thin –super model like. Spinelli was still small (A/N: she has a similar build 2 Topanga from boy meets world0

"Being tall thin and shapeless is noting to brag about" said Gretchen, when she spotted Spinelli's soaking wet jacket on the side she continued "Spin, please tell me you didn't go on one of your midnight runs?"

"Why would make you say that?" said Spinelli in a paranoid tone

"Well lets see, it was pouring with rain last night, and it still is. The wet jacket gives it away Spinelli, you HAVE to stop this, I'm worried about you –your showing the first signs of anorexia, if you don't stop this I'm going to have to tell someone. Theresa LeMaize went through this, she's now been sent to a health centre to get better!"

"I swear, if you tell ANYONE about this" she said angrily holding up her fist, she shied miserably and continued "don't worry –I'll stop, I no longer have a motive"

**I'm so damn frustrated  
Losing breath and now I'm shaking  
Gotta keep myself from breaking down  
Someone get me out**

"Hi Guys" said Spinelli to TJ, Vince, Mikey and Gus, who were waiting for them by the school gates.

"we've got 10 minuets –where d'you Guys wanna go?" asked TJ once everyone had exchanged greetings

"How about somewhere with a mirror? Its obvious neither Spin-ugly or Grundler have checked their appearances lately" laughed Ashley A from behind them.

"You better shut up!" said Spinelli angrily hiding her hurt feelings, wishing she could be the carefree tomboy she was in the forth grade.

"Aw did we hit a nerve Spin-ugly? You should be put in the world record book for the ugliest girl in history –Grundler right next to you of course" said Ashley Q smiling evilly.

"It explains so much on why no self-respecting guy would totally ever look at you" said Ashley B exchanging smiles with her fellow Ashley's "your, like major fat!"

"Yeah, like not even those guys like her" said Ashley T pointing towards Spinelli's 4 male friends "and that's totally saying something"

"Whatever! I don't need this!" shouted Spinelli before storming away holding back tears –at least until she was alone.

**Tear don't you fall  
Eyes don't you cry  
Need to get me round this corner  
I can't break down, break down  
Pride don't cave in  
Head don't let go  
While I'm open and you can read me  
I can't break down, break downI've locked it out for long enough  
Got really good at playing rough now  
I've been prepared  
And not really cared  
For being brave is getting tough**

"Come on Ashley's we don't want to lose our social status" said Ashley A walking away with her fellow Ashley's laughing loudly

"Those bitches!" said Gretchen angrily, herself being the only one who knew how self-conscious Spinelli had become "I'll go find her"

"No Gretch" said TJ stopping her from walking away "I'll go find her, I've been needing to talk to her, just tell the teachers you haven't seen me or something"

**Chin now don't you quiver  
Hands don't start to shiver  
Gotta keep myself from breaking down  
Someone get me out, someone let me out**

Spinelli ran into Kelso's and sat in a booth, she'd only been running for three minuets and she was out of breath –this being from a lack of food (the last time she ate was at lunch yesterday) She put her head in her arms and cried quietly wishing the Ashley's could just leave her alone.

**You smile like the cat that's got the cream  
I'm vulnerable and I know you see me  
There's so much I wanna say  
But this lump in my throat makes me walk away  
Away, Away**

TJ had stared running in the direction Spinelli had.

"She's probably in Kelso's" shouted Gretchen after TJ.

TJ took Gretchen's advice and hurried to Kelso's. he opened the door and glanced around –but it looked empty (A/N: Spinelli couldn't be seen) except for Mrs Kelso. TJ glanced at her and she pointed at the booth Spinelli was sitting in, before disappearing into the back.

**Tear don't you fall  
Eyes don't you cry  
Pride don't cave in  
Head don't let go**

"Spin?" asked TJ gently, he put has had on her Shoulder

"Teej, go away" croaked Spinelli not wanting him to see her cry

"I'm not going anywhere" said TJ shifting towards her and putting his arm around her –he'd never seen her cry before, and wasn't really sure what to do. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing"

"Come on Spinelli –look at me" he pleaded.

"No"

"Spin, you've been my best friend for 10 years, come on"

Spinelli slowly looked up, avoiding eye contact. TJ wiped her tears away slowly, as he did this Spinelli looked at him with surprise.

"Your not letting the Ashley's get to you are you-"

"So its obvious is it?" asked Spinelli bitterly

"Its obvious what that said hurt –but I don't get why"

"Don't you even hear what they say?!" asked Spinelli, getting irritated with TJ.

"Yes Spin, I do" he said taken aback by Spinelli's outburst "But not one but is true, they've been calling you Spin-ugly for years and you know that's not true and your in no way fat" Said TJ looking at Spinelli –attempting to see what the Ashley's saw but failing.

"You missed the obviously true comment-"

"There are probably loads of guys who like you" said TJ trying to find the perfect time to reveal his feelings.

"Like who?!" she snapped her tone gaining anger again.

"Me" said TJ quietly kissing her. Spinelli was a little shocked by the kiss but didn't stop to think, she wrapped her arms around his neck. They broke the kiss "sorry didn't tell you sooner"

"I'm just glad you told me" said Spinelli

"Don't let those bitches get to you" he said gently running her hand through her hair. They kissed once again, both happy they'd finally taken their relationship to the next level.

**Tear don't you fall  
Eyes don't you cry  
Need to get me round this corner  
I can't break down, break down  
Pride don't cave in  
Head don't let go  
While I'm open and you can read me  
I can't break down, break down  
Break down, I can't break down**

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**I hope you enjoyed this!**

**Please review if you like this! (and if you like it please tell your friends) if you don't like it, then please don't review because as my GOLDEN RULE goes "if you cant say anything nice don't say anything at all" p.s Constructive criticism is okay -just don't be 2 mean!**


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